cut me up

Despite all the downs of late I wouldn’t have thought it could get any worse but alas it did. Another unpredicted and angst filled fight  was awaiting me as I returned home late afternoon.

It begins with silence and a refusal to acknowledge my presence then all it takes is a mere few words, unpredictable words that triggers off a category five hurricane in our household. It’s so stupid to think I have to hold my tongue in case my opinions are not warranted and somehow offend. Must I continue to live in a somewhat vegetative state whilst under their roof? I suppose I know the answer to that since I’ve been tip-toeing around everyone in this household for years now. If only it were as simple as leaving, something I’ve been dreaming about since I was six years old but I have faith I will, hopefully soon.

This fight was as pointless as ever provoked by a news program in which I sided alongside the reporters rather than them. A simple “why can’t we just respect each other,” brought about a barrage of ill willed words and malicious insults. Those hate filled words always cut me deep down, striping away my self-worth. For times like these I take solace in the quote below, knowing it’s truth deep down I will move on as harboring bitterness does nothing more but harm me on the inside.

willsmith

I just don’t understand why some people are so intent on making others miserable, especially to those whom they’re technically meant to love unconditionally? Burdening their unhappiness on others. Why can’t we all just live in peace and respect one another regardless of beliefs?

Love,

xxx

 

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