I’d been sitting on this post all weekend, unsure how to proceed but mostly not wanting to put out more negative ju-ju for the Universe to suckle on. But after another restless night I felt like I needed to get this off my chest, regardless of any repercussions.
So without further ado.
Friday. It was the day from hell or to quote the famous last words of Comic Book Guy, worst episode ever.
It began with some magnificent news; an engagement announcement from a dear cousin of mine. I was filled with so much happiness for her because love has been something she’d been trying to attain for a while now and from the looks of things, Prince Charming has certainly found her. I was thrilled by this until Senior Green Eyed Monster also noted the announcement and reared his ugly head, pointing out my shortcomings and desires in life. He was also kind enough to remind me about my dream to move to the USA in which I also moved in with said cousin; becoming roomies and enjoying the high life.
The city life as only the US of A could provide me. She’d be the Carrie to my Charlotte, a whirlwind of social outings and romances. Excitement beyond my wildest dreams, filling me with a lifetimes worth of knowledge, experience and inspiration.
The city, people, friends and the opportunities. There would be many a good time and there would be many a heartbreak, but I didn’t care because I wanted it all. The good and bad of it, a life in which all my basic human needs are met. But alas, this has now been swept under the rug. Sure I can still move there, and I will since nothing will keep me from the land of the free, but those daydreams have dramatically changed. And I am not sure how to go about reinventing it.
Then arriving at my volunteer position only to find my colleague and general good girl was fired the day prior. It was horrifying and cast such a somber mood throughout the center. The day was then spent being pushed into meetings, managers wanting to make sure their golden volunteers had not been effected by the harsh events of the past twenty-four hours and that our opinions of them had not been swayed or influenced by a bad egg. It left me feeling quite mad. As if I could not see what had been transpiring since I’d started working here. I know who has been welcoming and who fobs me off as an unimportant nobody until they require me for a task.
I was also feeling incredibly guilty as the day before her dismissal I had overheard so much bitching and complaining about her and another staff member and had decided to hold my tongue in hopes of not provoking more anarchy. And I still am yet to disclose what I happened to overhear that day since now what would news of this caliber do anyway?
Finally on my way home I was run off the road by a black Tarago filled with children. That was the cherry to top off such a bullshit day. Not only did they merge into my lane while I was right beside them, forcing me immediately up onto a grassy area, they had the audacity to continue merging regardless of my furious honking, and without an apologetic wave. A van clamoring with kids, you’d presume one would be a tad more careful or considerate. That driving a vehicle that seats you in a higher position would make you aware of vehicles around you, especially a dark hued Honda.
No, why should you care.
I was just so livid at that persons disregard to not just those passengers inside the van, but everyone else on the road. I can’t afford car insurance so a bingle like that would be utterly disastrous for me. And because of this I drive like an eighty year old grandma, being super cautious out there, taking zero risks to avoid trouble not just to benefit myself but those around me. So you can understand my annoyance over this persons carelessness.
All in all I suppose you could look at that last event as a miracle. It could have gone a whole different way. You could also say I’m quite blessed that days filled with events such as these are hardly common.
But most importantly it could have been so much worse.